💸 Even If You’re Starting with $10, a Broken Heart and Nothing Left
I don’t have a pension.
Not because I didn’t work — I did.
I raised kids. I managed a household. I helped build businesses from the ground up..
But I wasn’t the one with the paycheque. That was by design.
And when it all ended, he walked away with the income, the pension, and the control.
I walked away with the children, a pile of debt, and a house that has both a mortgage and a line of credit against it.
That’s financial abuse.
And I’m still living it.
💔 Let’s Be Clear: I’m Still Being Financially Abused
My ex doesn’t contribute to the mortgage.
He doesn’t pay the utilities. He doesn’t help with the insurance.
He hasn’t paid a single cent toward the property taxes — and I’ve just cleared over $10,000 on my own.
He’s legally supposed to pay child support. Even then, it’s only half of what’s recommended. And just recently, he withdrew nearly a month’s worth of it to pay his own bills — money he had no legal right to touch. Money that isn’t his to take. But when has that ever stopped him. He has paid no section 7 expenses for kids activities or school uniforms or medications not covered by OHIP – but of course he professes how much he loves them!
But this is the reality: when you’re a survivor of abuse, justice is slow. Accountability is even slower. And in the meantime, the bills don’t stop and the lawyer fees just keep coming.
We sacrifice a lot to keep going. We stretch every dollar.
The kids and I don’t get everything we should.
I don’t get what I deserve either.
Food is expensive. Treats are rare.
We make it work — because we have to.
But surviving isn’t thriving. But some says, survival feels like the biggest win we can make.
🏛 The One Thing Keeping Us Off the Street
I need to be honest:
If it wasn’t for the Canadian Child Benefit,
we would be homeless right now.
I rely on it to buy groceries, pay bills, and give my children stability.
It’s not extra money — it’s survival money.
And it’s the difference between having a roof over our heads and losing everything.
☕ The $10 Decision: From Coffee to Control
I used to treat myself to a French Vanilla from Tim Hortons three times a week.
It wasn’t much. A comfort. A moment of normal. My only real treat in life.
But it added up — about $10 a week, or over $500 a year.
So I bought a $4 travel mug from Dollarama, and have started making coffee at home.
Now, that $10 goes into an RRSP in my name — invested into my future.
It may seem small.
But it’s not.
Because it’s not about the coffee.
It’s about choice.
It’s about control.
It’s about reclaiming the pieces of my life that I once handed over.
💸 I Started with Just $75
I opened an RRSP through Wealthsimple, a platform made for beginners and deposited $75. That’s all I had. But it was mine. As my daughter is on a humanitarian trip to Costa Rica I had less money to spend on groceries so I did a thing for me.
Wealthsimple is beginner-friendly, no big fees. I bought a fractional share of a stock I believed in. This means I can own part of a stock without needing hundreds or thousands of dollars.
It wasn’t about becoming a financial guru. It was about reclaiming something no one could take:
my autonomy. Its about saying this is mine. This can grow. This is for me.
💼 And This Week… I Applied for a Job
For the first time in over 20 years, I applied for a job.
I don’t know how I’ll make it all work with four kids and a million moving parts.
There are still those voices in my head — the ones that whisper:
“You’re not good enough.”
“Why would anyone hire you?”
“You’re broken. You’re behind. You’re too much.”
But I hit submit anyway.
And maybe I won’t get this one. That’s okay. There will be another.
The point is — I’m doing it anyway. I’m taking steps forward.
These little changes — the coffee, the RRSP, the job applications — they’re small, but they’re stacking up.
And for the first time in a long time?
I feel a flicker of hope.
A sliver of power.
A glimpse of who I used to be — and who I’m becoming.
And that? That’s priceless.
🎮 What I Do When There’s No Money at All
Some weeks, there’s nothing left to spare. Not even $10.
So I’ve found ways to make something — even out of nothing.
🕹 I use an app called Mistplay
It’s a mobile gaming app that rewards you with points for playing games and checking in daily.
It doesn’t give you cash — but you can earn Amazon gift cards.
When I can’t sleep at 2 or 3 a.m., I play. I connect. I calm my mind.
And over 16 months, I’ve earned $200 in Amazon gift cards.
That money has helped me buy birthday gifts, clothes, essentials — and soon, a new tablet for my son.
Not fast. Not easy. But it’s something.
📊 I signed up for a survey app last night
I couldn’t sleep. So I tried it. The surveys take about 10 minutes.
I’ve already earned almost $5 — once I hit that mark, I’ll send it to PayPal, and then into my RRSP.
It’s not going to make me rich.
But even $5 matters.
Every dollar is a thread.
Every thread is part of the future I’m stitching together.
🛠 A Survivor’s Guide to Rebuilding When You’re Broke
If you’re walking this road too — here’s what I’ve learned:
- Open a TFSA or RRSP — even if it starts at $0.
- Invest what you can — $5, $10, a gift card. It’s yours.
- Use fractional shares or ETFs — grow slow and steady.
- Track emotional wins too — like applying for a job or skipping coffee.
- Do what you can with what you have — Mistplay, surveys, second-hand shopping, homemade meals.
You don’t need to do it all.
You just need to begin.
💬 What This Really Means
Every skipped French Vanilla is a vote for my future.
Every $5 earned at 3 a.m. is an act of defiance.
Every job application is me planting a flag that says:
“I’m not done. I’m still here. And I’m taking my power back.”
I may not have money.
But I have resilience.
And I’m building something no one can ever take from me again.
🌱 Final Thoughts: This Future Is Mine
I don’t have a pension.
I have debt. I have a mortgage. I have kids and court dates and bills that don’t quit.
But I also have momentum.
I have a mug of home-brewed coffee.
I have an RRSP with $75 and growing.
I have a Mistplay account with $200 earned slowly, with grit and insomnia.
I have a job application in the system.
I have hope.
“I swapped my French vanilla for a future — one $10 decision, one survey, one broken night at a time.”
This isn’t about getting rich.
It’s about getting free.
And that future?
It may not be easy. But it is mine and its worth investing in.
